Full Moon Spread – Malikhain

In December, as the moon enters Capricorn, a Total Solar Eclipse came through and I’ve been feeling extremely sick and tired most of the time. As soon as it leaves, I started getting my period again and it was a painful four days. But all pain come and leave, do they?

I decided to prepare myself (or more like, reflected myself) before Penumbral Lunar Eclipse, as the Full Moon in Cancer arrives.

And here is my spread:

I’ve finally gained the trust from this deck again, after being strucked with juggling a lot of decks at the same time.

The first card, The Hierophant. Reminding me these days I’ve been equipping myself with new skills and abilities, as I’ve grown older and wiser. I’ve been feeling stagnant with my current set of skills, so I’m looking forward for this shift to bring me new challenges and job opportunities where I can learn new things!

The second card, Five of Wands. I’m torn in between a lot of dramatic communities, and how they shaped me. Knowing that I have past experiences of being abused in workplace, I’ve been staying away from being close to people that can hurt me. I’m no longer allowing these energies to hurt me. Five of Wands, I’m looking for collaboration. I know people will always find way to hurt me, but I’m not gonna let them do that to me.

The third card, Two of Pentacles. I know, Full Moon in Cancer and the Capricorn season wanting me to keep those bag of coins and be more wary of my spending. I know, that savings are actually hard, when you actually earn day by day. This is more than just spending issues, this is about seeking and giving balance again to my bank account. But what is the value of money, when I cannot make ways for living?

The fourth card, The Hanged Man. Again I asked, what is hoarding? Why would I be hoarding money, knowing that they are not forever with me? I will fall into financial turmoil again, and this continues on forever. Because the currency of living is based on capitalism, not the will of living. And what is living, when you are dying, everyday? I’m letting go my worries of not earning so much. I shall continue to earn day by day, if that’s the only path available.

The fifth card, Ten of Wands. I see that you mean, I carry so much burden inside me. This cosmic shift is taking me into more challenges and that’s going to hurt me as I hoard emotions inside me, that I might carry from others. I shall learn to take it one step at a time.

I understand your message, Universe. I shall take my rest now.

This Full Moon in Gemini, my coven sister, Shahir and I spend some good time at my place to do our spreads and shares insights. We haven’t met each other for quite sometimes, and it’s all catch up and roast time. Of course, the fire signs in us wouldn’t rest.

We had a good dinner. We did our year wrap spread, and the year ahead spread. As for me, I’m feeling like I might just go with the flow next year. There’s a lot to unpack for the year ahead spread, but I’m going to talk about this particular Full Moon reading first.

For this spread, I used Tarot of Cloisters with Work Your Light Oracle.

The Tarot of the Cloisters is a round deck with a stained glass effect inspired by thirteenth century rose cathedral windows. The medieval figures and settings echo the traditional tarot images on the Rider-Waite deck.

I’m particularly chose this deck for my spread because of the duality of the nature, for Gemini and Sagittarius. Mirror is such a good reflection of how a good actor people with major placements of those mentioned. In the activist space, people hold their tongues and actions so that we won’t hurt each other, but are we letting problematic statements pass by, as we do that?

I am struggling to understand how the spirit of collaboration and mutual aid became more extinct in our society these days. As if our good deeds are made for front pages of newspapers. And for those, activists working in the background are becoming more and more burnout for doing unpaid labor and carrying secondhand trauma with us. The world could be a better place if we all look into the bright side of each other (Six of Vessels).

Two weeks ago, I went to a workshop where my teacher told me how activists are comfortable enough in our bubble, that we forget other people does not speak our language. I see the world is changing, but it’s my side of the world (Nine of Vessels). The beauty of the world your chose, is not a path where you live alone, and for that I’m breaking my comfort zone to understand where can I work more, especially in the next year.

I see the Universe is not kidding with me when my Sagittarius card opens on Sagittarius season. Temperance is all about moderation and balance. Patience is key. As an activist, the world is full of threat and our sense of security is constantly compromised. This year has been extremely overwhelming for me as I faced a lot of consequences for fighting in what I believe in. And never will I regret the path that I chose. It’s here to stay.

What need to be celebrated? Small collectives (Ace of Wands) are constantly struggling to fund themselves and continue doing our work. Most of collectives are donations based and rent their alternative spaces. From the struggle with landlords and donations to live day by day, collectives faced threat to stay relevant, especially when there is giant organization took away funds from us.

Collectivism need to be followed up with emotional maturity (King of Vessels). This year alone I’ve learned about friction in organizations and how to handle them maturely. And I want to believe that this area can be worked more rather than being petty. Disagreements are common in collectives, what we could do is to find consensus and where best to serve everyone’s benefit.

Finally, the idea of consensus is where everyone is happy (Two of Vessels). Most of our upbringing is about majority rules, where the minority’s voices are completely ignored. In consensus practices of collectivism, it’s about understanding what serves the best function for the collectives and without harming each other. Though the approach is more pacifist, but the idea should exist to serve those who needed it.

Overall, Work Your Light Oracle brings us back to the call when collectives are destructed when your interest is not served. I believe that in collectives, fights are something common and this is due to each other’s experience and upbringing. Therefore, re-align yourself through communication and boundaries that serves purpose, not aesthetically pleasing only.

Coming up with the year wrapped spread and the year ahead spread soon. Till then.